Definition: The longing to experience pleasure or satisfaction without deferment

Yeah, I think I have this pretty much baked into my core-existence.

Recently, I’ve discovered I want a lot of things without having to wait or work for them:

  • Money
  • Dinner
  • Abdominal muscles
  • Holidays
  • Wisdom
  • The finishing of so many personal projects

And I guess the most ridiculous thing is that I believe I can actually get/achieve all these things on that quick-quick. Or maybe even more ridiculous, is that I believe I’m entitled to all these things as quickly as possible. That’s right, I believe I should get abs much sooner than Gym Crazy Jim who visits the gym 10 times a week, whilst I do 10 push ups a week in my room, all because I’m me.

This has been racking my brain recently.
It’s been racking my brain just considering how insane this thought process is.
How can I ever expect to complete anything worthwhile in less than 2 seconds?

It’s like, somewhere along the line, I’ve forgotten how to actually put effort into stuff. Maybe it’s a reflection of today’s culture where everything has to be instant, on demand and consumed in as little amount of time as possible. Whilst that’s a non-issue (perhaps, perhaps even, fake news), the effect that’s having on me is an issue.

For example, at the moment, I’m trying to learn some new programming languages and frameworks in my spare time to create apps, but also actually just for fun (because that’s the sort of thing I consider entertaining). But for me, I’m not learning fast enough in order to feel like I’m doing good enough, so what should be fun ends up being a demoralising waste of time. Another example would be with the book I’m meant to be writing. I just want to get it done as quickly as possible at New-York-Times-Bestseller-5-Star-Must-Read-Can’t-Put-Down-Buy-An-Extra-Copy-For-Jim quality. But even to open up the Word Document fills me with dread. Because I remember that in order to get to the end, I actually have to write the beginning and the middle.

And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character and character, hope. – Romans 5:3-4

I look back at that and I’m reminded that nothing significant in my life was gained in a minute:

  • Relationships
  • Degree
  • Strength
  • Perseverance
  • Character
  • Hope

I just need to keep on reminding myself to take it easy. When it comes to speeding up things which run their own course, there’s not a lot I can do.
Actually, I could stop putting myself down.

Also, I think Krispy Kreme donuts add fat, not muscle. Damn. If only I knew that two years ago.
Could have that six-pack right about now…

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